Paradise

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During a highly manic phase and one hellacious winter, my husband booked a trip to an all inclusive resort in Montego Bay, Jamaica.  To say I was pissed would be an understatement.  I’m in college and we make it work, but there isn’t an overabundance of money.

But after spending a week on Irie Island, it was a reset that has helped more than any pharmaceutical that has been shoved down his gullet.  A week completely disconnected(phone was on only for emergencies and WiFi was damn near nil at the resort) was complete paradise.

The man I fell in love with was there every single morning.  Some mornings up and ready to start the day even before I was, despite the steady supply of rum that was drank.

I saw genuine smiles and laughter that I haven’t heard in ages.  I had my best friend back.

I saw some of his symptoms come through and for the first time in a long time, I wasn’t afraid to call him out on them.  We met many people and made many new friends on the resort and many stories were told.  My husband had previously been to Jamaica off a cruise ship, an 8 hour day trip.  I had heard all about his trip before, but I noticed that as he talked to new people on the resort and the locals on the island his stories began to take on fragments of other people’s trip to the island.  I was extremely annoyed at first and would just walk away as his 8 hour excursion began taking on a new life.  Until I couldn’t walk away anymore.  I called him out on his lying and need to impress complete strangers.  He balked at first but the stories stopped being over inflated and with no blow up on his part.

Since we’ve been home things have been surprisingly well.  He’s not sleeping all day, he’s active and not shut down, he’s participating in life with my kids and our family.

He realizes how lucky we are to be able to travel to places like this and we’ve decided that we will scratch and claw to save for a vacation every year.  It’s not about the material things in life, it’s about the memories.  And Jamaica is a memory I will never forget.  It’s the country where I found my husband again and remember why I am here and just how lucky I am.

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